As I sit here at 12:30, wishing I was asleep, I think through my New Years resolutions and all the things I still want to do tonight. But, as I have been learning lately, there can still be joy and gratitude. I’ve been reading blogs and and books and the theme this past week seems to keep coming back to these things. Everything can somehow tie into that. I’m reading through a book, Seeing and Savoring Jesus Christ by John Piper (hey, guess what? It’s a free download!) In chapter 4, he talks about the joy of Jesus and how that joy can be mine if I would only allow myself to experience it, to let go of my minuscule notions of what I think joy should be. Then, I read this post on John 1 and this post on gratitude by Ann Voskamp. They reminded me that if I remember what things are important, if I put Jesus first and remember the things that I’m grateful for instead of living through each day without paying attention to the beauty around me, the joy will follow. And I’m not talking here about the temporary happiness that is so very fleeting, I mean the joy that pushes you through the tough weeks, the deep knowledge that I am a child of God and that not matter how crazy work is, or how much I want to just disappear for a few months, it will be ok because He won’t change. Not ever. So that has been on my mind, and then I saw this awesome video of John Green talking about creativity and boom! Motivation, priority, it all ties in! If you do something just to make money, you’ll never make enough. If you do something because you love it, well, there will be really hard days. But my gracious the good ones make it all so worth it.
So tonight I had the opportunity to skype with my roommate from college and my friend who has truly seen me for me and still loves me, and it was so good to talk about where our hearts and priorities are. It is so good to know that there are wonderful people who I get to walk on this path with, even when I don’t really deserve it. One of the projects that Anna Voskamp does every year is keep a Gratitude journal and I am thinking about starting one. But tonight, I am grateful for my friendships, my relationships with people who love me even after they’ve seen the ugliness inside, and I am grateful for a good God who gives me love and joy for when mine runs out.